The Greatest
Obstacle to Happiness
and How to Overcome It
By Dr. Robert Anthony
Think
of your present moment as your Point of Power, because it's
the only point where you can exercise your full power. For most
of us the present moment exists only as mental concept. If there
is such a place where all the creative forces of the universe
come together, how do we know it's the present moment? What
evidence is there that this is true? Consider this; all your
hopes for the future and even your memories of the past can happen
only in the present moment. The present moment is that one point
where everything comes together.
When does life start? When does it end? When do cause and effect
take place? When is it that we meet every challenge? When are
problems born and when are they resolved? When do we feel pain?
When are we healed? This all happens in the present moment.
We have been taught that those moments are separate from each
other, but in truth, they all take place in the now. No matter
what happens in life, it is always now, then now, then now -
always in the present moment.
Nothing
exists outside of the NOW. Nothing ever happened in the past. – It
happened in the Now. Nothing will ever happen in the future – It
will happen in the Now. When you think of the past it is stored
in the mind as a former now. And, when you think about the
past, when do you do it? – You do it
now! When the futures comes – it comes in the now. And,
when you think about the future, when do you do it? – You
do it now!
The past
and the future have no realities of their own. Their realities
are “borrowed” from the now. All unhappiness
is caused by denial of the present. We think problems are caused
by our situations in life, but attachment to the past and future
and denial of the now is the real problem. Ultimately then, there
is only one problem in life – not living in the now.
You cannot be unhappy and fully present now. It is impossible
to have a problem when your attention is in the now. When you
live in the now, a situation is either dealt with or accepted
now. A problem means you are dwelling on a situation mentally
without having a true intention or possibility of taking action
now.
ANSWERS COME IN THE NOW
Perhaps
you are seeking answers to your questions or problems. Notice
that sometimes you receive your answer, but most of the time
you don’t.
Why? Because you are not in the present moment when the answer
arrives! Anytime your mind is out of the present moment you
cannot receive the answer you need from Higher Intelligence.
The answer can come in many ways and at any time, but it will
always come in the present moment. If we spend most of our time
regretting and living in the past or worrying about the future
we place ourselves out of the present moment where all creativity
and answers take place.
Does it make any sense at all to desire, request, yearn and
pray for that which is closest to your heart and necessary to
your life and then not be paying attention when the answer arrives?
Our Point of Power can only exist in the present moment. We
create from this moment whether the materialization appears instantly
or later as a complex event. However, all creation takes place
in the now. If we really understand this truth, we will have
an inexhaustible supply of usable energy at our command.
It is only
our thoughts, attitudes and emotions in the moment that have
power. It is not what occurred to us in the past that will
force us on a path that we would rather not be on. It is how
tightly we hold on to that past by reliving its trauma and
drama in our present moment. When we constantly worry and re-examine
the past in order to discover what’s wrong with the present,
we reinforce the building materials that will create exactly
that which we are trying to escape.
VIBRATIONAL ENERGY OF THE NOW
Understand
that in every moment you are sending out a vibrational energy
through your thoughts. This vibrational energy is magnetizing
and attracting everything to you. If you send out a vibrational
energy that you don't have what you want, you will end up with
more of the same - more of what you don’t want and less
of what you do want.
If this is true, (and it is) then what could be more advantageous
than using this moment to send out a vibrational energy or thought
that is in alignment with what you want in your life? The answer
is nothing is more important!
I am talking
about the power of FOCUS. Ask yourself, "Am
I activating what I want in this moment or am I focusing on something
that doesn’t allow me to have what I want?"
Energy is tied into DESIRE. Anything that feels opposite to
that energy or desire creates a situation that prevents us from
having what we desire.
WHY WE HAVE TROUBLE LIVING IN THE NOW
Why does
the mind habitually resist the now? It is because the mind
cannot function and remain in control in the present moment.
It only knows about your past personal history and the cumulative
mind-set you inherited. In order for the mind to remain in
control, it must continuously seek to cover up the present
moment with the only thing it knows – the past.
Let me ask
you a question – can you be free of your mind
whenever you want to? Have you found the “off” button?
If you are constantly focusing on the past or future, you are
not using your mind; your mind is using you. You don’t
even know that you are its slave. It is almost like being possessed
without knowing it.
WATCHING THE THINKER
If you find it difficult to live in the NOW, try this: Stand
back and just observe the habitual tendency of your mind wanting
to escape the now. You will observe that the future is usually
better or worse than the present. If the imagined future is better,
it gives you hope, pleasure and anticipation. If it is worse,
it creates anxiety. Both are illusions.
Don’t judge or analyze what you observe. Watch the thought – feel
the emotion, observe the reaction – become the silent watcher.
This will help you to focus on the moment, because the moment
you realize you are not present, you ARE present.
FREEDOM FROM UNHAPPINESS
Problems
of the mind cannot be solved with the mind. Studying the mind
might make you a good psychologist, but doing so won’t
take you beyond the mind just as studying madness isn’t
enough to create madness.
When you
create problems you create pain. All it takes is a single choice – a
simple decision that no matter what happens you will no longer
create pain by trying to live in the future or the past.
Are you
worried? Do you have many “what if” thoughts?
Ask yourself what “problem” you have right now, not
tomorrow, not five minutes from now. What’s wrong with
this moment?
Is your
goal taking up so much time and attention that you reduce
the present moment as a means to an end?
Are you
waiting to start living? If you develop such a mind-pattern,
no matter what you achieve or get the present will never be good
enough.
The future
will always seem better. This is a recipe for permanent dissatisfaction
and non-fulfillment – don’t you agree?
Are you
a habitual “waiter”?
How much of your life do you spend waiting for the next holiday,
better job, your child to grow up, success, make money, be
important, and become enlightened?
Waiting
is a state of mind. Basically it means you want the future.
You don’t
want the present. There is an inner conflict between your here
and now, when you don't want to be here and a projected future
is where you want to be.
The key is to break the old patterns of present moment denial
and present moment resistance. We must learn to withdraw our
attention from the past and future whenever they are not needed.
Should a situation arise that you need to deal with now, your
actions will be clear and decisive if they arise out of present
moment awareness. Your response will not be a reaction coming
from the past conditioning of your mind, but from an intuitive
present moment awareness of the situation.
YOUR INNER AND OUTER PURPOSE
Your journey
has an outer purpose and an inner purpose. The outer purpose
is to arrive at your goal destination – to
accomplish what you desire, to achieve what you want, which of
course, implies the future.
But if your
destination or the steps you are going to take in the future
take up so much of your attention that they become more important
than the steps you are taking now, then you completely miss
the inner journey’s purpose. Your inner journey’s
purpose has nothing to do with WHERE you are going or WHAT you
are doing, but everything to do with the now. It has nothing
to do with the future.
If you don’t
understand your inner purpose you will fail at your outer purpose.
Keep in mind that the outer purpose is just a game that you
may continue to play because you enjoy it. And often you may
fail, but so what.
Ultimately
EVERY outer purpose is doomed to “fail” sooner
or later because it is subject to the law of impermanence of
all things.
The sooner you realize your outer purpose cannot give you lasting
fulfillment the better. When you have seen the limitations of
your outer purpose you can give up the unrealistic expectation
that it can make you happy. More importantly, you make it subservient
to your inner purpose.
Have your
dwelling place in the NOW and pay brief visits to your past
and future when required. Always say “yes” to
the present moment. Surrender to what is and see how life suddenly
starts working for you instead against you.
The key is to LIVE in the present moment, but know that you
are creating your future in this moment. What you are looking
for is balance in your thinking. In other words, living in the
present moment while giving thought to something you desire and
expecting it.
DARE TO BE DIFFERENT
We've discussed
the idea of choosing what we desire and
following our dreams. What stops many people from following
their joy is that they are afraid that their way of doing something
it will not be good enough or accepted. They compare what comes
from them naturally with what is considered the norm. That
whole process of conformity starts in school. They ask you
to write a poem and then it is compared to another poem and
if it is in the same form then it gets an “A”.
If it is different and has a form of its own then it gets a “D.” When
I was in first grade the teacher asked us to draw a picture of
a cat. When I was finished my picture was considered so poor
that I was told I have no talent as far as art is concerned.
I never drew or participated in any art form after that.
Perhaps
you decided that you couldn’t paint because you
are comparing your form to another form. But the truth is you
could no more paint like Van Gogh then Van Gogh could paint like
you. The difference is that Van Gogh believed in himself and
in his style of painting. That’s the magic.
No one can
do what you do exactly the way you do it. This includes business,
the arts or any area of life. A person’s self
expression cannot be judged other then by a total fool. What
you do, whatever makes you feel alive and joyful, is your unique
expression. And it is probably the only thing that will bring
you true joy and excitement.
THE UNHAPPY MAJORITY
Unfortunately, for many of us, we spend much of our days following
and doing what we have come to believe we need to do, rather
than what truly excites us and what would, for that very reason,
end up bringing us the joy we seek.
Can we truly expect to experience enormous joy and happiness
in our lives if the first concern we have in the morning upon
wakening is to be on time to a job that does not bring us joy
and excitement? If seventy percent of our days are filled with
activities that do not bring us joy, excitement and love, then
the remaining thirty- percent cannot compensate for that. All
the seminars, books, meditation, and affirmations are not going
to help.
Yet the more time we spend doing things that do not truly bring
us joy and excitement, the more money we spend on other things
trying to compensate for our growing unhappiness, and this ends
up bringing us more debt. So the end result is that we are tied
even more into working at what we dislike. It is a self-defeating
circle.
Have you
ever been in a room with many unhappy people? How did it feel
in there? Now imagine what billions of unhappy people are doing
to the world. Unfortunately we have become so accustomed to
this energy that we don’t even notice it anymore. It’s
as thick as molasses everywhere with the exception of a few pockets
of joy now and then.
What we
fail to understand is that when we have billions of people
doing things that they don't want to do, it creates unhappiness.
That unhappiness creates a collective energy that goes into
the environment and causes more damage to the environment than
everything else combined. It is like anger causing an ulcer.
The anger created the ulcer and people’s sadness creates
the negative result in the environment.
There are many people concerned about the environment of the
planet. They want to save the rivers, oceans and the forest.
While that may be commendable, I can tell you that the energy
from so many unhappy people on this planet is what is poisoning
the environment more than everything else combined.
We will
not solve our environmental problems until we solve the sad
energy problem. What we don’t realize is that our
physical environmental problems are created from the negative
energy that comes from billions of unhappy people. Instead of
trying to clean up the environment, we need to clean up the thinking
and unhappiness of the people who are cause of our environmental
problems.
OTHERS MAY NOT LIKE IT
By now I
hope you see that
all change comes from the inside. Trying to change things using
the outside-in approach is always doomed to failure. On the
surface this looks selfish, but you know by now that we can
only change the planet one person at a time.
As you begin to search for and follow your joy and excitement
you may feel this process appears a bit selfish. There may be
other people around you that feel you are being selfish, but
that is only because they cannot understand that by allowing
you the freedom to find your joy and excitement that this will
in turn make it easier for them to find and follow their joy
also.
In the beginning having family around you and also having children
can at times make following your joy and excitement more challenging.
Sometimes following your joy may feel like you are not being
practical or looking after your responsibilities. You could subconsciously
be afraid that you will end up playing away your time, or indulging
yourself, rather than looking after your family. In the beginning
it can be a delicate balance, but as time goes on you will be
much happier and the quality of time you spend together will
improve considerably. Also, other things that need to be done
will seem more enjoyable when you allow yourself to do them when
it feels right rather than when you thought you should be doing
them.
As you follow your joy and excitement people will automatically
see how much happier you are and how much more you are enjoying
life. This gets their attention and will slowly rub off on others
around you. So in the beginning you could possibly receive some
resistance from those close to you, even some resistance and
fear from yourself. This will pass as you become happier and
more excited to live each day. Joy is very addictive and draws
people towards you. As people see that it is okay to follow your
joy and excitement and that it is creative rather than destructive,
they will very quickly attempt to bring this process into their
own lives.
A STEP AT A TIME
Following our joy is not one large step, like quitting our job
and spending our days sitting under a tree. That is not following
our joy - that is escaping. There is a big difference between
following the things that truly excite us and doing things to
escape from a life that does not bring us joy.
The trick is to find, in the present moment, the things that
would bring us the most excitement, and then do whatever we can
to follow that excitement, even in the smallest way. This causes
a chain reaction that brings us more opportunities to do what
we love to do.
I think
that the hardest time people have with following their joy
is trying to make a living and at the same time trying to follow
their joy. I have noticed that one of the very first things
we fear is our financial concerns. That’s why we start
off slowly following the path little by little and letting things
build upon themselves slowly.
However, I will tell you this, whenever I followed my joy it
always turned out to be the most financial rewarding thing at
the end. When you follow you true joy, wherever that leads you,
and even if it changes from time to time, then the details will
work themselves out on their own. If you try to work out all
the details and debate them to death, you will go insane before
you find the right answer. But if you just follow your joy and
what brings you excitement then you will end up doing what is
best for you and everyone.
Whatever we desire is waiting for us to claim it. You have already
learned you do not have to know the details or how do anything.
All you have to do is focus on what you want. I can't take away
your fears and doubts no matter how many pages I write. You will
just need to trust yourself and the Power within you that you
can truly follow your joy and do things in a way that bring you
joy and have it all work out.
The greatest obstacle to happiness is not living in the present
moment and not following your joy. The solution is to do just
the opposite. If you find yourself focusing on the past or the
future, remind yourself that the present moment is all there
is, and then surrender to what is and see how life suddenly starts
working for you.
If you put
the same amount of effort into finding what gives you joy as
you put into going to work at a job you dislike, you will end
up with results that will make you think, “Why
did I wait so long to do this?”
FINAL THOUGHT
I have come to understand that when we enter this world we all
do so with two wings. One is the Wing of Infinite Power. This
is your connection with the Universe. And whether you know it
or not, that wing is flapping by your side supporting you twenty-four
hours a day 365 days a year from now to eternity. The other wing
is that which you have consciously activated. This is the Wing
of Self-Effort. This wing has to fly equally as hard as the Wing
of Infinite Power. When it does you will have flight into the
world of unlimited possibilities where anything and everything
is possible for you. Then and only then will you understand how
truly powerful you are and that you have all it takes within
you to create what you desire.
So follow your joy whatever it may be; in whatever form it may
come; let it come forth as it may; to be as it may. Let your
joy, excitement and uncensored creativity carve you into the
image of the Creator. For the crevasses and lines on our faces
show not our age but how much we have dared to be true to ourselves. Until next
time. Your partner in change,

Dr. Robert Anthony
www.DrRobertAnthonyOnline.com/Secret
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